The ego is meant to be our window to the world around us- a neutral and extremely useful source of information about what’s happening: a way of organizing oneself: “the most central part of the mind, which mediates with one’s surroundings.”
You first develop your ego when you are two or three years old. It creeps into existence the moment you realize that you are not empty- you are a self, and everyone else has a self in them. As you grow up, it latches onto positive and negative feedback, and uses them to build the story of who you are.
“The ego likes certainty, it likes security, it likes repetition, and so it’s always reinforcing its own vision of itself, and that starts to restrict us, to confine us, to make us think that we know ourselves better than we actually do.”
Many elements that define our identity were inherited - we can’t do much about them. But, we can change how we deal with them. Balancing your ego is accepting all your sides, rather than exaggerating one.
“Maybe some of those fixed ideas that have been operating inside of you since you were a little kid, and conditioning the way you interact with other people, with the world, maybe those are not all so right. Maybe you’re not as “really real” as you think you are, and you could start to let go of some of that a little bit.”- All of this it is not about being hesitant, wek, or confused!- by the contrary…
The full nuance of ‘egolessness’ is not to be completely without ego, but to doubt the story that it tells you. “For many people [the ego] stays in a kind of immature place.”
The part of us that clings to things outside of ourselves, making them a part of our identity, the unhealthy ego, it is a “fraud”, but saying ego is bad is as preposterous as stating water is bad, because it can drown you or fire is bad, because it can burn you. Ego, water and fire are all life sustaining, and they only bite if they are misused.
Your greatest distraction is your inner perception, not your ego.
Your self is fluid, not fixed. Stop being at war with reality: flex your ego.
The point is that when you strip away the fear, the stories, and the judgements away from what’s happening in this moment, and simply notice it, you become free to choose your response.
Embrace your ego to find the real you, and the core of your own unique personality.
The process of self-discovery and spiritual growth has been called self-realization; because it’s based on the premise that you are the key to your own soul evolution, furthermore your heart, wisdom and logic hide the secrets to your own growth.
These essential self-discovery methods can’t be accomplished without the embrace of the ego of the self.
At some point, we need to stop identifying with our weaknesses. The ego can convert anything to its own use. If we can accept our ego functionality, for what it is, quite ordinarily in fact, then we can use it as part of the path. The struggle to eliminate ego’s heavy hand is merely another expression of ego. We go around and around, trying to „improve ourselves”. Insights come only when there are gaps in our struggle…
Ego is not only your best friend and protector through this life, but through all your future incarnations. Ego is your spark, your fire, your creativity, your individuality and your key soul signature. An artist can’t create without his/her ego. It’s what makes you unique.